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Talking to Your Children About End of Life Care

adult child holding elderly parent's hand

Parents spend most of their life caring for their children and trying to make sure they’re doing well. As we age, however, those roles can reverse, and the child may have to take care of their parents, and make sure they’re doing well. Talking about these kinds of things can be uncomfortable, and the reason a lot of people avoid the conversation altogether. They’re important conversations to have, though, and there are ways to get through them. Here are a few ideas on how to talk to your children about end-of-life care. 


Elder care is expensive, and there are a number of ways to go about paying for it. Let your children know what your plan is to pay for this care, and the steps you have taken to ensure the cost is covered. Let them know if they can help in any way, especially in terms of paperwork, or seeking out the right resources. Not planning for long-term care or nursing home care can create huge issues later on, and lead to a lot of stress for the family. It is better to make these decisions while you have time to ponder them, without the stress of needing to make immediate choices on these significant, life-changing decisions. 


Talk with your family about any health issues you are having and whether or not you plan on designating your child as an advocate for your health and medical care in the future. Again, these are large, important decisions, and your children may want to be involved. Being upfront and honest about any health issues is the best way to go about it. Some parents may want to hide the truth from their children or downplay their current condition. It’s better to be honest. Your children may not be comfortable being an advocate for your healthcare down the road, or they may take on the role happily.


It is important to let your children know what your plans are in terms of where you plan on living as you age. Maybe you plan on staying in the home you own, or maybe moving to a retirement community makes more sense. These are big, important decisions to make.


Speak with your family about your end-of-life plan.  By having this tough conversation with your family now, while you are still present to communicate your plan in the most comfortable and productive way possible. After you have had this conversation with your family, it may be time to start looking at what your options are for end-of-life care and deciding on the next steps.

Hire an Elder Law Lawyer

It is beneficial to consult with an experienced and qualified elder law attorney, who can help guide you through these decisions. That includes decisions on whether to set-up trusts for your assets, who’s going to be your executor or trustee, your power of attorney, and so on. These are important decisions to make, and the better they are, the better it is for you and your family. The caring lawyers at The Mattar Firm are here for you. Call 239-222-2222 today.


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